Her presence makes weekends a pain. I cannot sleep early because she's in that stage of her life where she still thinks that sleeping late makes her cool. I got out of that stage by the age of 14 and she's 16 now. She thinks I'm being old...well, I am old. If I have nothing to do and I can sleep, I will sleep. I don't see the point of staying up till 1am or 2am every night because it's "cool". I don't it's cool when I feel like shit the next day and start snapping at everything that moves. Honestly, they say on Tumblr that INFJs never get angry and an angry INFJ is probably just sleepy. That's absolutely right. I do get into a horrendously bad mood when I'm tired.
My mom has told me to tell my cousin off, but I do feel bad about it. It is, for the weekends at least, her room as well and I could always just reach over for my earphones to drown out her videos and her laughing. I know it's 3am (or 4am, I'm not even sure anymore) and she's supposed to be asleep, but I do not have the right to tell her to, in my opinion at least. Since I can drown out her voice, I should just do so. I should only tell her off if there is no way for me to drown her voice out, which would then make her actions an infringement upon my rights. So as long as I can do something about it, I think there's no reason for me to tell her off. My mom obviously thinks otherwise, since she's that kind of person to act like the whole world owes her a favour, but I honestly cannot take on such a personality, especially in a sleepy state. I'll bend over backwards to avoid conflicts, as long as I can bend over backwards.
And then there's the issue of her using my study table that I also tolerate. My mom rolled her eyes at me, but my dad's worse. I actually got scolded for letting my cousin get her way. Well, she does need to do homework too and I'm fine doing work in the living room. I'm not going to wait for someone else to take the initiative to do something nice and since it's just 2 days, I don't really mind exiling myself from my own room. My mom just thinks I'm being too nice for no reason and my dad thinks I'm pathetic. Obviously he wouldn't understand...in every argument we ever had, I'm always the one to take a step back because I realise that he never would and even if I'm still convinced that I'm right, there is no reason to escalate the tension any further just for the sake of proving him wrong. Firstly, my dad will never give in to an alternate point-of-view if he is convinced of his own and secondly, I have much better things to do than argue with an immovable wall all night. It has gotten to the point that in every discussion I have with my dad, I never fully express my viewpoint because I know he despises it. We legitimately cannot see eye-to-eye on everything.
There are other people who tell me that we can't see eye-to-eye on issues, but they probably never seen my dad and I argue. Even from the simplest things like - if someone accidentally knocks into you, will you apologise? My dad's opinion is a straight-up "no" because "it's not my fault and you were the one who inconvenienced me". My opinion is that I should say "yes" either way. because no matter how I see it, I should. If they knocked into me accidentally, then they didn't mean it, so I should apologise too. If they meant to knock into me, then he/she must be having a bad day and I should take the initiative to be nice. My dad called me weak and pathetic again...well, if being strong means I'm going to be insensitive as hell, then I'll rather be weak.
Then there's the long-lasting argument about the value of friendship and love. In my dad's mind, friendships are built for you to...make use of those friends as stepping stones in life. Love is, in his words, just chemical reactions meant to ensure the survival of the species. Parental love is nothing more than an animal instinct to ensure that their offspring survives to pass on their genes. The look of disgust on my face when I heard all those...I think I sort of deserved those slaps I got because it's probably very rude to look at one's own father with such a disapproving glare.
Humans are so much more than that, and even animals, even animals are more than that. Wolves nurture their young to ensure the survival of their genes. Yes, that is right. But why does the rest of the pack also participate in bringing up the new pups. The Beta of each pack, despite being unrelated to the pups, becomes their caretaker. The Alpha male, the father, teaches his pups how to hunt. The rest of the pack protects the new pups and even the Omega participates. Maybe it's still just a mechanic for species survival, but look beyond that and the difference between how species develop such behaviours is what defines love, I think.
Love among a pack of wolves come in the form of how wolves are unique in pack dynamics. The Omega submits entirely to the Alpha and the rest of the pack, getting the last pick when eating. However, they also have the least responsibility and is protected by every member ranking above them. The Alpha has uncontested power over the pack, but with that comes the great responsibility of protecting and ruling over the pack as a kind leader who takes care of his underlings. That, to me, is a way wolves show love towards one another. Also, if you want to talk about love in the exclusive sense, then wolves demonstrate it too. I don't think many know this but wolves pick a mate for life. Upon the death of their mates, wolves rarely take a new mate and spend the rest of their lives mourning. And humans often mock animals for their lack of "complicated emotions". In the human world, how many marriages actually last for life?
But I can't say any of these to my dad, because if I'm wrong - I'm wrong with no valid argument. So, why do I even bother? Probably because I cannot settle for any injustice in this world, especially when the injustice is done in degrading the value of humanity? My dad is so biased that he can believe that all religious people are bad. And my face is just like "...that makes no sense, dad". I know that's the way he was brought up, but do you not question such things? How can you generalise people like that...and also, I'm the kind of person to believe that there is no such thing as a bad person, just like Kishou Arima says in Tokyo Ghoul:
Even Paarthurnax in Skyrim phrases Good and Evil more as a matter of choice. Of course, because of the nature of the creatures in Skyrim, there are those born innately Good/Evil, but Paarthurnax still phrases the end result of being Good/Evil as a choice.
Okay, moving on to other topics:
Top Mario Galaxy 1/2 Songs
Although I may like 3D World a lot more in terms of gameplay (because of the cat suit), I think that Mario Galaxy has the best music in the entire series...probably because they have a lot of good additions and good remixes. Here are 10 of the most notable soundtracks, in my opinion.
1. Bowser's Galaxy Generator - Galaxy 2
2. Bowser Jr. (Fast) - Galaxy 1
3. Gusty Gardens Galaxy - Galaxy 1
4. King Kaliente (Fast) - Galaxy 1
5. Toy Time Galaxy - Galaxy 1 (Super Mario Bros. Remix)
6. Buoy Base Galaxy (Underwater) - Galaxy 1
7. Cosmic Cove Galaxy - Galaxy 2
8. Fluffy Bluff Galaxy - Galaxy 2
9. Throwback Galaxy (N64 Remade Stage) - Galaxy 2 (N64 Remix)
10. Starshine Beach Galaxy - Galaxy 2
MBTI Stuff YAY
1. MBTI Travelling
ENFJ: Buys lots of guidebooks. Someone who trusts others' advice and goes to exactly what the guidebook tells them in the best.
Ehhhh...isn't that boring though. I mean you should check out the recommended places, yeah, but you should also go walk around or something...just don't get lost.
ENFP: Gets lost in a crowd. Someone who would inevitably drag one pal and run off towards something "cool" they saw, only to get both them and their friend lost.
Could get frustrating after a while, but I usually keep in mind the places I've walked past anyway. Okay, I'll go on a trip with ENFP.
ENTJ: Needs to be in control. Someone who tries to manage everything that's going on and gives vendors who pull you over dirty looks.
You can take your F cousin and go plan your trip together then. I want no part in this restrictive and convoluted travel.
ENTP: The fun one who provides an air of spontaneity. Someone who would suddenly decide ot change an activity or run through the streets.
These are the people who will make a vacation feel like a vacation. The lack of scheduling, the spontaneity, they may become a bit overbearing and scary, but still, a nice change of pace. Right now my vacation crew has ENFP and ENTP.
ESFJ: Checks that everyone is happy. The typical mom of the group who over packs just in case one or two or ten of their friends needs a toothbrush, toothpaste, floss, etc
May become a little too naggy but useful to keep around in case those scatter-brained P types end up forgetting their things. But I don't know if I want to bring these people along on the actual travelling around because they might become quite annoying.
ESFP: Gets distracted by small vendor shops. Someone who has to look at everything and enjoys doing things and being there 24/7.
While the spontaneity of ENTP and ENFP may be tolerable since they can probably sense it when I'm annoyed, ESFP may just drive me crazy. I still would like to keep to a schedule, though probably much less restrictive than ENTJ's frigging business-like schedule.
ESTJ: Has all the maps and herds everyone in the right direction. Someone who micromanages things, but ultimately gets everyone where they need to be.
Oh man, fuck off and join the ENTJ and ENFJ. You can micromanage where they will be every second of the day though I reckon that ESTJ and ENTJ will be fighting for control over the schedule.
ESTP: Doesn't mind physical activity. Someone who would find a hiking trail or physical activity to do a trip.
Ah, I don't mind bringing these people along. They would probably make a day at the beach a whole lot of fun and be a source of motivation for hiking trips.
INFJ: Needs constant breaks. Someone who would bring along a book for some peace and quiet after a long, hectic day.
That's actually very true. As much as I enjoy spontaneity in the day activities, at night, back in the hotel, you'd better stay away from me. I'm recharging my introvert batteries and I dislike it when people disrupt me when I'm reading something.
INFP: Would want to stop at cute cafes hidden in alleyways. Someone who would find "hidden gems" in a city and stay in a hostel.
I still enjoy my fancy hotels, so INFP will have to give way for that. I don't mind being dragged to secluded and weird places that most people don't notice though. They often make for nice little distractions from the noisier tourist sites.
INTJ: Thoroughly researches the city just in case some sort of natural disaster happens. Someone who can take over if the ESTJ/ISTJ gets confused and will emerge unscathed.
So basically people who are very organised but won't force their organisation and schedule on the others unless they have to? Yes please, you are invited.
INTP: Use the experiences to broaden their mind. Someone who would be interested by the different types of technology in a foreign country.
They would be the type to bring you sight-seeing across the cities and honestly...I don't mind it. Though I don't like it either.
ISFJ: Caught up buying souvenirs. Someone who buys souvenirs for all their friends because "This one reminded me of you!"
No wonder INFJs and ISFJs get along. I like doing such things too! I often make it a point to buy one present for every one of my close friends...not from a single souvenir shop but across a variety of them.
ISFP: Reads all about food. Someone who would choose the food and take the photos of every dish before eating.
Get out. I hate it when people take pictures when eating. No questions asked. Get lost.
ISTJ: Similar to the ESTJ. Makes sure everyone is where they need to be. The Dad of the friend group, ready to tackle any problems the group faces and problem solve.
Then your existence is void. I do like to have a Mom in the group, but I can Dad the group myself. Not to mention that I'm probably more flexible, tolerant and everything, so we don't need an ISTJ. Thank you very much.
ISTP: Wouldn't mind travelling alone. Someone who would branch off from the group to do exploration by themselves.
I really don't mind if they disappear them. It's like keeping a cat - they leave when they want but they'll come back in the end.
2. MBTI As Scents
ENFP: Citrus - bright/exciting, sharp/quick
I like citrus scents! I haven't met many people who don't like them, but I've met many who love citrus. Even those who claim they don't like it usually end up liking it if you don't tell them what the scent is first.
ENFJ: Warm towels - warm, unoffensive, handy, everyone likes
Once again, everyone likes but no one loves. Seriously, is anyone's favourite scent "warm towels"? That's bizarre as heck.
INFJ: Tea - warmth, soft/nice, gets more intense as it steeps
Yes so I like my own type's fragrance, that's nice. It is a scent that intensifies in effect as time goes on and the effect you find in drinking it can be obtained through smelling it too e.g. soothing.
INFP: Cinnamon - lots of small, sharp smell, warm
I like cinnamon buns...but they can get a little too sweet. Those cinnamon-scented pencils, for example, are great at first sniff, but can become quite overwhelming in a short amount of time.
INTJ: Pineapple
That's just weird...but it's almost citrus-like with a tinge of sourness. So I guess I'll like it?
INTP: Old books
Is it weird that I think books just generally smell really nice? I don't even read fiction that much anymore but I still like the smell of the books. Weird. I'm weird.
ENTJ: Pine
The opposite of citrus scents. In Cosmetic Chemistry, I've learnt that citrus often appeals to the childish side of people while pine and other woody scents are for mature people. That is why I dislike pine but I love citrus.
ENTP: Coconut
Don't like coconut. Looks weird. Smells weird. Tastes weird. Just generally very weird. An acquired taste/smell apparently.
ISFJ: Vanilla - warm, traditional, well-loved, everyone's favourite
Ah yes, that was the scent I associated with my ISFJ friend in the first place. It's a very sweet yet warming scent, somehow bringing out a protective spirit in me (like I'm a guy or something). It's not that she actually has that scent around her, it's just what I associate with her.
ESFP: Chocolate - feel great in the moment, not so much in the long run
No, you're wrong. I don't ever mind the smell of chocolate. It's amazingly aromatic and fragrant. Dark chocolate more than milk or white, because the smell of cocoa is stronger.
ISFP: Baking bread - home and warm feelings
I love the smell of bakeries! There's always something so endearing about the scent of freshly-made bread and the image of a traditional baker.
ESFJ: Gingerbread - warm, holiday treat, traditional
Gingerbread...I'm partial to gingerbread. It does smell amazing but the taste itself isn't all that great.
ISTJ: Freshly-mown grass
I can't believe this type got such an awesome smell. Natural smells like grass, rain, etc are my favourite scents and tea happen to be on that list because it's one of the only manufactured goods so closely linked to nature.
ESTP: Bonfire smoke
I'm sorry. I cannot take smoke, no matter the source. I seem to be overly sensitive too it, not allergic, just sensitive. It makes my nose itch unbearably and even makes me want to throw up. It's a weird reaction I have towards smoke...
ISTP: Leather
Usually something that people like, but to me, it's a little too artificial and formal.
ESTJ: Fresh ink
Why? Why would you like the smell of ink? I guess liking ink as an object is fine, but the smell?
3. Most to Least Possessive
1. ENTJ
2. ESTJ
3. INTJ
4. INFP
5. ISTJ
6. ISFP
7. ENFP
8. ESFJ
9. ENFJ
10. ISFJ
11. INFJ
12. ESFP
13. ENTP
14. INTP
15. ESTP
16. ISTP
I was going to be surprised, but then I realised who are those that topped the list - ENTJ and INTJ. The theory I now have is that, the more you blame problems in your relationship on yourself, the lower on the list you are. The reason why INFJs are so low on the list isn't because we don't get jealous or aren't committed enough - it's probably because we see every mistake as "our fault". Really, I think I would be the type that when I get cheated on, I wouldn't even get angry at the guy. It's probably something I did, what I didn't do enough, that has caused him to cheat. So I wouldn't get possessive...I'll just get clinically depressed. Meanwhile, ENTJs and INTJs are likely to blame everything on their partner while INFPs are just Yandere-central.
4. The INFJ and Casual Conversations/Small Talk
Most Introverts are against having small talks, especially since they have to interact with others for no apparent reason. For INTJs and INFJs, this is particularly true, because while both types are very enthusiastic in holding intellectual or meaningful conversations, small talk can drive these types from liking you to hating you in seconds. These types speak for reasons, INTJs for knowledge, discover, wisdom and INFJs for counsel, comfort and warmth. So when asked trivial questions, both types are likely to not reply, believing that there is little reason in offering a response.
For this post, we are targeting INFJs in particular. INFJs, unlike other NF types, are innately aware of social responsibilities and social cues. Because of that, they have a very fixed and accurate impression on the type of responses appropriate for different conversations. For every trivial, common question asked, they have a response prepared. However, because they remain to be Introverts, small talks annoy them very quickly, driving them to the point of disliking interaction with the person initiating such conversations.
INFJs are the most extroverted of Introverts, because of their secondary function, Fe, which makes them acutely aware of the emotions of people around them. While Te, an extroverted function, works by allowing the user to express their thoughts openly, Fe works by absorbing information instead. INFJs thrive on their Fe and Ni combination, much like the ENFJ, but their natural introversion creates a natural dislike for conversations that cannot awaken their Fe. If the conversation is deemed as pointless, shallow or just unnecessary, the INFJ can become the ultimate introvert - replying with short, clipped answers or not replying verbally at all, throwing a glare instead. On the other hand, a meaningful conversation, stereotypically one that calls for the INFJ's counsel, turns them into an extrovert - talkative, warm and exceedingly attentive - thus the confusion with ENFJs.
The combination of adherence to social cues and the dislike of casual conversations does not bode well for INFJs or their friends. When offended by a question deemed to be pointless, INFJs are usually very unlikely to respond negatively. They will often stick to social cues and respond accordingly, meanwhile making the decision to avoid all interactions with the person again. Of course, persistency can act in 2 ways. The INFJ can either go into a withdrawal almost magical, with them vanishing the moment you try to appraoch them. Or, INFJs will tell you outright that you are annoying them.
INFJs are walking contradictions. They will not want to hurt your feelings by telling you off, but frankness is still one of their values. When pushed to the limit, they will snap and turn on you faster than any other type with cold, biting sarcasm found in their T cousins, the INTJ. "Did you think I was going to respond any other way?" "Don't bother asking me that." Anything that may make the INFJ seem more like an INTJ. Of course, their responses are still laced with underlying emotions.
Avoid small talk with INFJs, but INFJs are aware that small talk is sometimes necessary. We can't all go into speaking about our deepest and darkest secrets on the first meeting. But all INFJs have a limit, for everyone in their lives. At one point, the INFJ will expect you to reveal something, by which time if you don't, they will "give you what you deserve" - coldness with coldness. Even if you are not being cold, the act of not revealing something deeper is a violation of a social cue and thus, the punishment exacted is what the INFJ deems to be an equal withdrawal from the relationship.
While INFJs may not be the most compatible with S types, SF types may be an exception precisely of their strict views on social cues. SFs, while not being attuned to the INFJ, abide by the same social cues that allow INFJs to be more receptive towards their short-comings. INFJs may also clash with INFPs and ENFJs, because of the two types' common ignorance towards social cues that may make INFJs very cautious of them. ENFPs fare better because even if the INFJ isn't a believer of the MBTI, they intuitive sense that ENFPs are genuinely and sincerely scatter-brained and unique people who cannot be forced into following social cues.
5. Stereotype NF Pairings and their Differences
The common NF pairings, ENFJ x INFP and ENFP x INFJ may seem very similar in an American drama setting, but still possess very distinct differences. One of the most basic differences is that in the ENFJ x INFP pairing, the INFP is almost always the socially-withdrawn boy while the ENFJ girl is some popular but nice girl. In the ENFP x INFJ pairing, however, the pairing works for genders in American drama.
ENFJ x INFP pairings are often very idealistic, yet 1-dimensional. The quiet and withdrawn boy at the corner of the class who is musically and artistically talented but too shy to be noticed. The ENFJ girl who is either his childhood friend or one of his only friends for some other reason. The story is very typical, with the extrovert trying to open up the introvert. The 1-dimensional nature comes in because the growth of the characters is often 1-way, with the INFP learning to open up and gaining more friends, growing his life, while the ENFJ's benefits are limited...often something like...gaining peace in her life?
ENFP and INFJ pairings are usually more dynamic and is also common in Japanese Animations, or Anime. In the case of an ENFP boy and INFJ girl, the girl is almost like an INFP, withdrawn, quiet, shy, and talented. However, unlike the INFP, she also has scenes where she becomes quite authoritative or shows off her ability to be more than just a shy girl. She is also, in the eyes of the ENFP, a strong and intelligent girl, whose potential is unseen the eyes of others. The ENFP boy is a popular guy who is also the class clown. In a class project or some other group event, he finds himself in the company of the INFJ and through the project, learns that she is much more than just a shy girl. This overcomes the problem of a 1-dimensional character, as in the INFP, who is usually just shy. The INFJ stereotype allows for a multi-layered character which the ENFP boy has to uncover. The ENFP boy is also more of a multi-dimensional character because ENFJs are often portrayed as "perfect" characters, with no flaws needing fixing. On the other hand, ENFPs may not be as attuned to their ability to care for a single person, which the INFJ brings them to realise. In the ENFP and INFJ interaction, it is common for the ENFP to try to teach INFJ to open up but end up with the INFJ teaching the ENFP something more about themselves.
Still, these are stereotypes. ENFJs are anything but perfect, with flaws that INFJs can fix as well, although often it's ENFPs that are getting the INFJs' counsel. INFPs are not just shy and withdrawn, 1-dimensional and boring characters. INFJs are also not as mystical as most shows make them out to be, and the process of uncovering their true selves is often unrealistic and unlikely to actually cause an INFJ in real-life to open up. ENFPs are not all scatter-brained, hyperactive individuals and that only applies to those that have not developed their tertiary and inferior functions adequately.
Outside of the drama perspective, the pairings may still work as they are portrayed. The INFP and INFJ's difference in "reflecting emotions" and "absorbing emotions" respectively is the same in ENFJs and ENFPs. ENFJ's walls are defined by their ability to reflect back people's emotions, so that they see what they want to see. ENFJs do not actually feel the pain from the other person, such is the quality of "reflection". ENFPs, like the INFJs, absorb emotions. Thus, they may often not seem like they understand you, because they aren't reflecting your emotions back, but they have absorbed every ounce of your emotions in themselves. Though as an INFJ, I show disdain towards the act of "reflecting" as the equivalent of lying or pretending to understand, it is actually debatable as to whether "reflecting" or "absorbing" is more empathetic.
6. Interesting Facts about the INFJ
- Least common type in the population: 2% of women, 1% of men
- On personality trait scales, scored as Sincere, Sympathetic, Unassuming, Submissive, Easygoing, Reserved and Patient
- Among highest of all types in college GPA
- Among most likely to stay in college
- Most likely of all types to cope with stress by seeing a therapist
- Highest of all types in marital dissatisfaction
- Personal values include Spirituality, Learning and Community Service
- Commonly found in careers in religion, counselling, teaching and the arts.
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